Journey From “OR” to “AND”- My Decision

“Yes, baby I love you a lot but it’s just that you cannot work after marriage, our society does not allow it and after marriage you will have so many responsibilities; you have to take care of my parents too, try to understand and please forget this job ka bhoot from your mind” Rahul explained me above lines in a great details and left my home. Rahul-my would be husband, we met three years ago fell in love, started loving each other crazily and then “Marriage”- which is the last stage of keeping relationship forever till the eternity-"according to Indian psychology".

We knew each other past three years but yet just few months before marriage he started all his demands like – “I won’t work after marriage, I have to wear Indian Sarees every day as his parents do not like jeans or salwar suit, I have to join grooming classes to learn some more domestic things, and in the end I shouldn’t be in touch with my male friends after marriage”.  I was almost tired by hearing his regular increasing demands I just couldn’t understand if it is that same Rahul for whom I was so much crazy. It’s almost 15 days left for our marriage and he has changed himself so much I couldn’t even imagine in my dreams too. Should I say No to this marriage?? What my parents will think?? What answer will they give to our community people?? “No- I can’t say –no, for this marriage, he gave me two options-either to marry him by accepting all his demands or should forget him forever. I loved him but he took advantage of my love and forced me to move inside somewhere in the dark.

I did not understand anything what to choose but after all it was my life and I had to decide one particular decision for myself and after hearing him I didn’t even feel to be with a guy like him. I gathered all my confidence and went to talk to my parents and told them about the issues which were going on between me and Rahul. As expected my parents also shouted at me as much as they could and additional to that they also suggested me to accept his conditions but I was not weak enough to accept him with all his conditions.

Next day in the morning I went to meet Rahul and said No -for the marriage then I just moved towards my home and started packing my entire luggage. Suddenly my parents started asking me where am I going just few days before marriage?? I informed them that I cannot marry to Rahul and I informed him too and as you are also one of the supporter of him and society, so I know I cannot reside here for long, better if I leave this home now and then I left my home permanently. I cried a lot because I was all alone in the journey of my life but I knew that I am right and I cannot live my life in parts so just wiped my tears and moved on in my life.       

Compromises give you comfort if it is mutual or it is till some extent but it gives pain when it destroys your personality/your own identity. I just cannot be labeled by one tag and cannot sacrifice/compromise on each pace of life. Just because I am a girl I cannot hide my feelings, just because from the fear of society I cannot let any guy take advantage of my emotions. I am a girl with full confidence and I do have sense to identify what is perfect for me.

“This post is a part of #UseYourAnd activity at BlogAdda in association with Gillette Venus“.